I Heart You
PERSONALLY I blame the drugs.
There’s no other excuse really. Why else would a reasonably sane, grown, intelligent woman buy heart-shaped cookie cutters, with no intention of making cookies, for Valentines Day?
I must have been off my face.
It was supposed to be a simple trip to the supermarket, to pick up a Valentine’s Day card for Yer Man and some lamb for stew for tomorrow’s dinner.
But some madness, no doubt brought on by the painkillers I’m horsing into me to try to cure the laryngitis and tonsilitis I’ve been plagued with since last Wednesday, made me stop by the Valentine’s Day tat on special offer.
Heart-shaped candles. Heart-shaped fake petals. Heart-shaped boxes of chocolates. Heart-shaped poxy ramekins. (What IS a ramekin anyway, why isn’t it just a dish?)
Anyway, I should have just walked on by, as I usually do, rolling my eyes at the tat, wondering who on earth buys this sort of stuff.
But something made me stop. Something caught my eye. Sweet little heart-shaped cookie cutters. For €1.50. They were practically giving them away.
‘But you’re not making cookies,’ the rational part of my brain piped up, reminding me that cookies aren’t Slimming World friendly.
‘Yeah but, shut up, I could make heart-shaped something else’s,’ I wittily riposted, fighting my way through the throng of last-minute shoppers, and flinging them triumphantly into my basket.
Vegetables, I thought feverishly, wandering aimlessly up and down the aisles. I could cut out heart-shaped vegetables to go into the lamb stew!
Yes! Heart-shaped vegetables! I could even mould the meat into a heart shape as well! Heart-shaped EVERYTHINGS!
Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m not against a little Valentine’s Day cheese, I always buy Yer Man a card and a box of chocolates is always welcome, but that’s generally where I draw the line.
Actively planning to spend hours chopping vegetables into the shape of a heart is just that one step to far. That way madness lies. It’s a thin line between that and calling my husband Bunny, in company.
What have I become?
I actually like Valentine’s Day – I know it’s commercialised, blah de blah, I know. But a day to celebrate love can’t be all that bad. It’s not all that bad. It needn’t cost anything and in today’s busy world, often couples forget to stop and smell the (heart-shaped) roses. So a reminder every February 14th isn’t the worst thing in the world.
But heart-shaped vegetables?
I’ve gone over to the dark side. And it is heart-shaped.